


handsome purple-haired people aren't allowed! (rize and touka can enter)

by PondRam



Category: Tokyo Ghoul
Genre: Dont ask me why, WHERE EVERYONES HAPPY, WHERE NO ONE IS DEAD, WHERE NO ONES A GHOUL, alt universe where everythinGS COOL, basically all of them r ooc, cool wingwoman probs ooc!rize, im sorry theyre ooc as hecka, im the gr8st, im v happy bcause i like rize, let me live like this, rize and kaneki r family friends, sorry - Freeform, tSUK IYAMAS ACTUALLY SUAVE WHAT THE FIRKC, toukas gonna be the overprotective mom friend, yeeeaaa
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-09-15
Updated: 2014-09-21
Packaged: 2018-02-17 12:17:12
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 809
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2309366
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PondRam/pseuds/PondRam
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Alternate universe where everyone's alive and no ones dead and there are no ghouls.</p><p>Kaneki Ken had a simple life, except of course this changed when a close family friend of his introduced him to a stupidly handsome purple-haired male.</p><p>God damn it Rize</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> what do u mean ken kaneki is ded
> 
> what do u mean ghouls exist
> 
> w h a t d o u m e a n

Ken Kaneki led a fairly simple life.

He had two friends, like books, is fairly reserved and decent at academics. He also worked part time at this cafe, so he can earn some extra money for more books. He was average at best. 

His two friends were very close with Kaneki. Hide, is a childhood friend of Kaneki, while Touka was met through the cafe. They were both a bit protective of Kaneki and while he was a little bit happy his friends were protective of him it was a bit unnerving. He also had a close family friend, Rize, who often visited him in his apartment.

Rize was somewhat, a bit manipulative. She was pretty and often used that to her advantage to make Kaneki do whatever she wants, like buy her some food. Rize also liked eating, although she always stayed thin. Kaneki marveled at this, she once saw Rize eat a feast meant for ten people and the next day she didn't gain a weight. He was curious on what Rize did to not gain weight.

Kaneki was sitting on his favorite chair in his apartment, reading a book he recently scored in the book store. It attracted him because his favorite author mentioned it once in an interview, and there was also a lot of good reviews in the internet, so why not? Kaneki was in the middle of the first chapter when a knock disturbed him from reading his book.

Grumbling, he marched towards the door, muttering obscenities at the person behind the door.  _This better be good_ , Kaneki thought as he opened the door. 

He was greeted by the sight of Rize and a man in a tacky purple suit with hair colored purple. He examined the man's face, it was aesthetically pleasing to the eye, his jaw was nice, his eyes were deep and entrancing. The man also was examining Kaneki, this made the boy a bit self conscious as he was just dressed in his pajamas. _  
_

Rize coughed, "If you boys are done checking each other out I suggest we go inside? It's quite cold." Rize fake shivered as she gently pushed Kaneki away and entered.

"Hey!" Kaneki protested, "You haven't even-" he was cut short by the scary glare Rize gave him.

"Now I assume you are wondering why I am here?" Rize asked, "I actually have a teeny tiny favor to ask of you Kaneki" She said it in a way that made Kaneki shiver a bit, that was the tone Rize used to confirm that she would not take no for an answer.

"Um, what is it Rize?" Kaneki hesitantly asked. He was quite scared, on what the favor would be, Rize seldom used that tone except that one time she forced Kaneki in a dress for quote and unquote "charity reasons". Kaneki was fairly certain he was forced for blackmail material, but was too scared to confirm.

"Well, I want you to date this man beside me."


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ok so ive had this chapter in mY DRAFT FOR A LONG TIME BUT SINCE IM A DUMMY I FORGOT ABOUT IT AN D PLS ENJOY 
> 
> warning oocness everywhere and bad stock knowledge of french
> 
> im also sorry for the short ch apter

"I want you to date this man over here."

. . .

"Rize, have you gone mad!?!?" Kaneki shouted, "You may have those pictures of me but I won't date anyone because of-" Kaneki saw Rize flash something pink-ish and thus he stopped talking.

"Hold your horses Kaneki!" Rize said, calming him down, hiding the pictures, "It's just I really need your help. Won't you hear me out? No pictures, I promise."

Kaneki calmed down, "Fine, why would you want me to date this man?"

"This garcon has a name?" The purple-haired companion of Rize coughed, "My name's Tsukiyama Shuu."

"Yeah, yeah" Rize waved her hand as if she was shooing him away, "This is Tsukiyama Shuu, have you seen him in TV?" Kaneki shook his head, "Wow, I always knew you were a nerd but I cannot believe you're a big nerd." 

"I take offense to that!"

"Yeah, like you would," Rize chuckled, "Anyways, the reason is because my parents and his parents are trying to 'couple us' up, because he's famous and I'm pretty." she coughs, "and you know I'm not that interested in men, and he's not really interested in women so we just need you to date him for a few months and basically make it believable so our parents won't ever think about that again."

"Wait, why can't you date other girls?"

Rize scoffed, "Do you think they'll take that fine? In this world, gays are more accepted than lesbians. We, are just sexualized, I shudder to think the things my father would say once he finds out," she smiles, "besides I'm picky, he not too much."

"Yep that's true monsieur I am pick-wait, what" Tsukiyama .

"So what do you say? Are you up for this?" Rize asks.

"One condition."

"What?"

"Delete those photos,"

Rize clicks her tongue as if she's making an important decision, "done, and done."

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ok so i used my few knowledge of french for the french bcause i was too lazy to look up google translate


End file.
